“The Door”

To my sweet Amy,

Every time I look at this photo of your mother and me, I can hear your voice. “I don’t want to shoot, daddy,” you said. “Please don’t make me.”

You were afraid. You thought shooting a photo was the same as shooting a gun. I mean, they could be. Sometimes. They both cause hearts to stopin either a frozen memory to forever cherish or a frozen corpse to forever remember. Now we know that only one of those two can become reanimated.

Your mother… She was living proof of that horrifying truth.

You see, I didn’t kill mommy, sweetie. I know it’s hard for you to understand that, but I saved mommy. I saved her from… whatever this damn sickness is.

Now I’m sick, too.

Do you remember when you got sick that one time after you kissed mommy? It was when she had a throat infection. Well, the same has happened to me.

She always left me breathless after each kiss, but this time she also took my lips.

I can still hear your voice as I stare at the door in front of me. “I don’t want to shoot, daddy,” you said. “Please don’t make me.”

You should’ve, sweetie. You should’ve shot me right in the head. It’s the only way. The only way to save me.

I want to be the memory you’ll forever cherish, not the walking corpse that will forever haunt you.

I’m so cold, Amy.

One thought on ““The Door”

  1. I found you via weird nj I’m ocd if I read an advert like yours compelled to look up.i grew up with cemetery love my father b 1909 had to entertain my sister and I Saturday am giving ny mother a break.he often took us to Christ episcopal valley section of Belleville .his maternal grandparents buried there. He was very social.tom knew everyone buried there plus detailed bios.fascinating way to learn history.fox ex the poor woman who died young and beautiful cause used lipstick before the food and drug administration formed small cut massive infection pre penicillin.i look forward to finishing your most interesting opus if there was a hard copy I’d be buying that as Xmas gift for my sister.ty for reading my comment.bigger ty for such a creative endeavor.ending with have gone on walking tours old really ancient graveyards tracking down relatives.

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